Star Who? 5 – Time Apple Polo

We just had a long weekend so I nearly forgot to post this since I was thinking it was Tuesday instead of Wednesday. A real life time paradox, fitting of this stupid blog! Too bad the new Doctor Who was a bit shit…

Doctor Who 2005 S08E05 – Time Heist 2/5

I love a good heist movie. Even the bad ones I tend to at least like. So why did I find this one a bit crap? The Doctor and a team have to break into the universes most secure bank, and there’s a weird memory wipe bit so you’re discovering the reasons along with the Doctor. There’s lot to love. It just completely falls flat. I’m going to blame production. The design and everything is fine, the plot is a bit dodgy in execution, but what really bugged me was the look. I know it’s a cheap show, that’s not the problem. Well, it’s partly the problem. They attempted to make this episode “cool”, with slow motion bits to a “James Bond” style score. When the score is cheap synth music, the whole thing looks like it is trying too hard to be something it’s not and just falls apart. So many shows these days rely on a score that just undermines the whole thing. See CASTLE as an example. If they scrapped the score and the slo-mo, hip “Oceans 11” style stuff, it could of been great.

 

Star Trek S02 E05 – The Apple 3/5

Kirk and landing party are exploring a planet that appears to be not unlike biblical Eden except the flowers spit poison darts into your chest and the rocks explode like bombs. Just like Eden! They encounter a naive, never aging populace that survives via worship of a God personified by a giant mountain idol. So this is another one of those mystical Star Trek’s that seems to be pro-Christian living and freedom while shitting all over the idea of organized religion. It’s kind of bold stuff when you think it’s 1967 primetime TV, especially with Spock’s concerns that Kirk is the “Apple” of Eden, giving knowledge to the people who will be corrupted by it. It ends up being a pretty good episode, with the “God” putting a big whammy that threatens to destroy the Enterprise. Kirk claims a crew of just under 500 people if I recall correctly, seems small for a ship that size right? 400 of the crew must be janitors. Which reminds me, where’s the Star Trek show dealing with the janitors and people who are on the ship to earn a paycheck? I still think that would be a great Star Trek show! Someone make it happen. In the end, another solid Star Trek episode.

Doctor Who S01E04 – Marco Polo 3/5 (Seven Parts)

This one is a tough one to review since it’s the first “lost’ episode. At some point, the BBC decided it wasn’t worth keeping old shows, so they wiped their tapes. At this point in time, no video elements of this story arc are known to exist. The version I watched is a fan made restoration using still photos and the surviving audio elements. So it’s tricky to give this one a fair shake since it’s basically a two and half hour slide show. That said, plot and story wise, it’s a good one. This would be the first historical episode, and it has an educational feel to it that is a bit awkward. Was Doctor Who designed to be “Carmen Sandiego” style educational show? Anyway, after fixing the faulty switch from the last serial, the Doctor gets Ian and Barbara back to earth, only the early twelve hundreds where Marco Polo see’s being able to use the Doctor’s caravan (TARDIS) as a gift to Kublai Khan so as to get out of some obligation he has. There’s lots of intrigue, the Doctor himself is even more unlikable than before, and it’s pretty clear that the show should be called “The Adventures of Ian” at this point since he seems to be the real drive of these adventures and is constantly explaining and figuring out the plot points. It’s a shame this one is lost since based on the photos, the production design was a step up. In the end, if you can tolerate power point episodes, this one (probably) isn’t the worst you can do if you’re obsessively trying to watch the entire series.

So there we are. The first crap episode of the new Doctor Who. the preview for episode 6 showed the Doctor becoming a janitor at Cara’s school so he can keep an eye on her romantic interest. So the series might be heading strait to the shitter and become completely unwatchable. So next week should be interesting!

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One thought on “Star Who? 5 – Time Apple Polo

  1. Have faith. There is improvement for Who. Time Heist was a huge disappointment and the first of the episodes made by plot-point-cliche lottery

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