Oh Fuck it’s Friday!

Guys, I nearly forgot to post today. Everyone would of thought that I was dead, or that Friday in fact DIDN’T happen and that they were ghosts. Like Bruce Willis in that movie. The Sixth Sense. When you think about it, seeing dead people shouldn’t be a “sense” but a “power”. The Sixth Sense should be something like, being able to get through a maze blindfolded using the hair on your arms. What’s that? You don’t have hairy arms? Sorry ladies, but you will die in the maze! Man, it’s just like Friday didn’t happen! I’m referring to anyone who shaves their arm hair of as a “lady” regardless of gender by the way. It seems like a lady like thing to do. The only reason to shave your arm hair off is so it doesn’t get caught in your opera gloves right? I think we can all agree that shaving arms is a lady thing to do.

Right, two blogs of dealing with the terror of a non-existant Friday is three blogs too many so lets get on with it.

By on with it I mean that I don’t have much more to add.

Tomorrow is Record Store Day in Edmonton. No, we all don’t get our own personal record stores, don’t be stupid! It means that local independent record stores get exclusive releases and I’m in a froth to get to my fave store early so I can buy the ones I want. Your town might have such a thing too so you should check that out HERE. Support your local stores already! What is this, 1992, why are you not doing this yet?!?!

Right, here’s my current candy situation:

Roca Cola Balls and Soap Candy
Roca Cola Jawbreakers and Soap Candy. This is my old fashioned candy favourite. The combination of the two in a closed container makes it smell like vomit though. I wont be combining these again.

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Jelly Belly, the worlds greatest jelly beans! There about 5 different assortments in this bag. It’s fucking delicious so I have it hid in my desk drawer. The people I work with can eat the vomit smelling stuff!

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Chocolate in my other drawer. These were uneaten after my night of going to the movies way too much week and make the perfect back up to the vomit candy.

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Honey and Chocolate Chippy flavoured Teddy Grahams. Technically this is a biscuit and not a proper candy. I’m an idiot and bought these as a healthy choice to all the other candy I have in the office. If you look closely you might see granola bars under these bags. Yeah, like those are getting eaten any time soon! In your stupid face granola! (The granola bars have dark chocolate chips in them if I’m being honest.) There’s also a toll free number for my work. I have no idea if it works internationally. how do toll free numbers work? Is it a flat fee my company pays or are they charged per call? Well I get fired for racking up massive phone fees from all of you calling? How about we don’t experiment with this yet okay? Let’s learn more about international toll free phone calls first.

And I am EXHAUSTED! Three blogs in one week? SO MUCH WORK! Next week we might have a task. That’ll be exciting right? this is still exciting I hope? No? Yes?

Is it sad that I want to see “Chimpanzee” before seeing “The Hunger Games”?

The end

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20 thoughts on “Oh Fuck it’s Friday!

  1. You know there’s a Jelly Belly factory about an hour away from where I live. They give tours and samples and everything… or so I’ve heard. I haven’t actually been there myself. In the other direction there used to be a Hersheys chocolate factory with tours too, but that’s gone now. The town is called Oakdale and it claims to be the cowboy capital of the world. I once bought a car there, but not from a cowboy. Heck, while I’m talking sweets, the place were I live, Stockton, CA, claims to be the birthplace of Giradelli Chocolate. It was later that the Giradelli people moved it over to San Francisco where it actually made a name for itself.

  2. I plan on blogging on Mondays. We’ll see how that goes. I’m crap.

    You have so many sweets. SO many sweets. You bastard. You’re making me crave chocolate and I’m trying to get hot for the summer. Jerk.

  3. Pfft! A lady would never admit to having arm hair, particularly not the type that ‘needs’ to be shaved off.
    Nice to see a Russ’s candy blog of sorts! I only have a tenth of a kitkat finger and half a bag of nonstop. And ginger nuts… but they’re biscuits, not sweets…

  4. I thought for a second there that the yellow bag in the last pic said “petite olssons” but it didn´t.
    Now I´m depressed. 😦

    • I grew up on the Disney True Life Adventures. I love them and how they tell the stories. These are i the same vein. The photography on Africa Cats was amazing. I’m in for Chimpanzee. Planet Earth and all those will still be there being all serious.

  5. Dude. The candy factory thing you’ve got going on, apparently, is so not cool. Not. Cool. Also, kudos on blogging three times a week. I’m shooting for just one. We’ll see how that goes.

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